Where Do I Want To Be In 10 Years?

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Every January, people set an array of goals or make New Year’s Resolutions, because they are so resolute on how they are going to obtain that goal. By February, half have already fallen off the wagon of success. Very few ever achieve their New Year’s resolutions. What makes the few more successful than others; finding the answers means the difference between living another year with regret of what could have been of our lives, or living the greatness of what we could actually become. Knowledge and action are the difference between a great life, or a mediocre life. In January, “Cemeteries are frozen tundra’s of broken promises and unfulfilled dreams”. Don’t let your dreams die with you!

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This year I decided, I am going to live this year like no other. What if, every day I did five things to accomplish one of my goals; and five things to accomplish another. I know, you are thinking, who has the time for that right? But you do! Honestly! Because once you make your mind up to do something, usually no one will change it. It all comes down to time management and discipline. You have to decide here and now what is more important, living the life you have always lived, or living the life you deserve.

fight for your dreams

Which is another part of the problem. Many times in our lives we are conditioned by three basic concepts:

1) Afraid of Failure

2) Feeling Unworthy/Undeserving

3) Fear of Rejection.

How we avoid things because of our fear of failure or being rejected; how we spend our money; how we let things go; and how we don’t set healthy boundaries, all comes from these three fears.

If we try, we may fail, so instead we don’t try or don’t follow things through, living a self-fulfilling prophecy.

We are afraid of rejection. We are afraid no one will love us and accept us if they knew all of our flaws, but everyone has flaws.

I started a non-profit company with little money. I had a passion and a vision in 2009 to host nationwide conferences, with local advocates, to build, FACSA Centers (FACSA stands for Family and Friends Fighting Against Child Sexual Assault) in every state, which will have everything from counseling services, doctor services, psychological services, housing, security, job training, all under one roof. When the families left at the end of the year, they will leave to a home they can rent to own, and have a dependable transportation. I mortgaged my home to help fund the Shattering The Silence Tour and Documentary Project, which was a 115 city tour across the U.S.A. and Canada.

Life sometimes, gets in the way of dreams, and I have been home the last two years caring for my aging elderly parents. While at home, I have been able to write a children’s book. I am now writing my autobiography, which will be complete in four months.

I am working from home and have kicked off three national campaigns this year.

  • Having No Statute of Limitations Nationwide. I am working on a collaborative effort to get ambassadors to petition and fight for the bill to go before their legislatures this year.
  • Having Free DNA Testing and Processing for All Children of Sexual Assault. I am using the same concept. It seems when you conspire to do so something, the universe opens doors for you. I have made connections of collaboration that are inspiring.
  • We are hosting a Global Pop Up Art Project at the University of Southern Florida, April 23, 2016. This is a global event to showcase prevention and education of child sexual assault and human trafficking where artist, survivors, showcase their art, music, dance, theatrics, poetry, etc. to and to create a paradigm shift to shatter the secrets of silence and shame, which surrounds it.

I decided this year, would be like how I want to live, not only the next 10 years of my life, but the rest of my life. I started January swinging for the fences.

In January, I began to finish my autobiography and plan to write other books to help fund, with grants and fund raisers, the FACSA Centers. I submitted part of my documentary work to a couple of Film Festivals, which I hope will get picked up. If so, it will help our cause in raising awareness and education, and also bring in much needed funds for my non-profit; and for myself.

In 10 years, I will have written films, books, created apps and games for our programs. All of this, will have been because of the three little words, “I Have Decided.”

 

I kicked off the National campaigns, and I work every day to make sure they are successful. Whether I make the April goal, or it takes me longer, as long as I get the bills implemented, no matter how long it takes, I know I have done my best; and that is all anyone can do.

Theodore Roosevelt said it best, when he said, ““It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
― Theodore Roosevelt

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2016 HAS UNLIMITED POSSIBILITIES

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 Connie Lee/Founder/President/FACSAFoundation.org  

Our hope is to educate communities on prevention of child abuse, sexual assault, and human trafficking. For it is important now, to teach the educators, first responders, judges, attorney’s, on how better to represent survivor’s, and to give survivor’s the tools they need to fight this multi-generational epidemic.  Together, we will create a paradigm shift for mental health, sexual assault, and human trafficking prevention. In doing so, we will have made safer environments for children to live and fulfill their dreams.

            

 

  LEAVE THE SECRETS AND BAGGAGE BEHIND

 

 

We have just embarked upon a new year 2016. You have each day to challenge yourself to fulfill your dreams and to make this the best year you can make it. We have started off with some great projects, which we need your help with, and that I hope you will join us on this journey as well.

We have a video project asking survivors of child sexual assault and human trafficking to:

1) share on paper or white foam board, the secret that has you riddled with guilt shame, fear, and degradation for so long.

I have posted mine to give you an example. By sharing your story, you will inspire others to share theirs and to help them heal. We have kept the silence too long. This has protected the perpetrator and all those around the one who raped and sodomized us as a child. This traumatic event has affected every aspect of our lives and we cannot fully heal until we let go of the secrets.

It’s Time! You are no longer alone! Please show your support for others and support them on this courageous step. By speaking up, you take the power away from the perpetrator, and the secrets we were forced to hold in silence will tumble like a house of cards. Your voice is more powerful than you think! You matter more than you know! Today we stand together to say “No More Silence!” “This Is Not Our Generation!” Today, we will not stand by in indifference and say nothing, or stand idly by and do nothing. We will do what we should have been doing all along; Believing our children, Standing Up For Our Children; and Fighting For Our Children!!

Please send your videos, wherever you are from, to facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

We need help promoting this event and will need volunteers at the University of Florida, Saturday, April 23, 2016, from 9 a.m. – 6 p.m., in the William and Nancy Oliver Gallery Room. There we will exhibit other art, videos, music, dance, poetry, theatrics, etc.

I consider, “Child Sexual Assault The Last Great Frontier” and Together, we are a mighty force which will make great change this year!

Thank you for joining us and the FACSA Foundation Revolution!

Connie Lee/FACSAFoundation.org/President/Founder

facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

318.540.4464    https://youtu.be/-2qYGSiMZYU

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2) The second video project:

1) PLEASE SEND YOUR STORY, FROM WHEREVER YOU ARE, TO facasasavethechildren@hotmail.com.

We will be gathering stories to share at the William and Nancy Oliver Gallery Saturday, April 23rd with show times of 9am – 6pm, University of South Florida

One story has power and stands tall, like a domino, but as we align together, we gain momentum, and become an indomitable force!

Connie Lee/Founder/President/FACSAFoundation.org

facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

318.540.4464

 

3) We are taking the two Facebook petitions we have listed below on a national stage. We have requested ambassadors in all 50 states to join us, gather petitions signatures, volunteers, and help us collaborate to pass these bills in each state, collaborating with those who may be working on the same project.

We have a lot to do. I will be posting an organized list of who to reach in each state. Thank you for your help.

 

To help with signatures you can download the petition and pass it around your community and state, email it to a friend, share it with your social club, or on your social network. I will provide a sample letter to reach out to your local representative.

Thank you.

Connie Lee/Founder/President/FACSAFoundation.org

facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

3185404464.

I look forward to working with you and meeting you. Talk to you soon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

REVEALING THE TRUTH

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                                            REVEALING THE TRUTH

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Back in 2012, we took on a case where a young woman was sodomized by a couple of local cops. An on duty police officer called an off duty police officer, to come to the police station so they could take a female prisoner in the local jail, out for a few unlogged minutes, to be sodomized; who was she to tell right? The current police chief Will Lynd, asked her to talk to the local police chaplain and not tell anyone, knowing she had an IQ in the 70’s.  I can speak of this case, which I don’t speak of other cases because they involve children. I can speak of this adult case. She came to us, the FACSAFoundation.org and we obtained a pro-bono attorney for her. She won her case suing the city and the local police department. When we picked up the case, the on duty cop was still working, and they let him go when they learned we obtained an attorney for her. The cop who sodomized her got a year’s probation.

This was not my first run in with this corrupt police department. I fell in 1998 at the local International Paper Plant and shattered my wrist, damaging the nerves. Rumors spread around our small town that I was on illicit drugs. I called the police chief then, Ronnie Coleman, and offered to take a drug test, but he would not hear of it. He knew I was a Christian woman, quoted me a scripture, then said, “We will see.” He instead had my board member, Maggie Haskins, continually going through my cabinets looking for drugs, asking if I ever had ever been on cocaine or heroin, over and over; regardless of how many times I said no.  Later, I began private sitting with Chief Lynd’s grandparents. When I first began, on one of my first nights I stayed over, I had to leave to drive my step-mother to the doctor; then return to drive the Willie and Elaine to the doctor. When I left, I passed, Ronnie came by waving very friendly, which I thought was very odd. When I returned, he passed me again and had the usual unfriendly wave. I wondered what was up? I checked my bags and all the hair was out of my brush. I did not say anything, but later heard Willie ask Butch, was she? Butch shook his head no. They knew I was not on drugs but had already made complete asses of themselves and invested so much time, they had to prove something.

When I returned from the beginning of the first Shattering The Silence Tour and Documentary Project Tour for the Christmas Break, I would walk around the walking trail behind the senior center. Each morning, a police officer Rex was there. I just thought he normally walked, until I told him I was heading back on the road. I did not see him Thursday. Instead, when I went to the local library, Ronnie Leonard, from the Sheriff’s Department, came in interrogating everyone about a complaint someone made about someone selling drugs there, and everyone was looking at me. I don’t know what the hell they are looking at, but I will be damned if I let them set me up. I left early the next morning. http://www.ktbs.com/story/29033202/video-surfaces-of-alleged-webster-parishinmate-abuse

http://www.ktbs.com/story/29033202/video-surfaces-of-alleged-webster-parishinmate-abuse

I came back in February 2014 off of the tour, to care for my ailing step-mother, which enabled her to stay in her home. She had a granddaughter who was bi-polar, a black belt in karate, and on drugs, constantly taking her grandmothers meds. She called it swapping out. It talked to my step-brother, Ron Keene, but he said, no one can deal with her because she is deadly volatile. When her grandmother, did not give her meds, she stole them. I hid them for a while, until the fateful day her grandmother decided to give her some more meds. She came early for them because her underage boyfriend, had not urinated in two days and was in pain. They did not have insurance to carry him to the ER, so she stopped by to get meds from her grandmother. She tried twice to get me to hand them to her and I refused to do it.

She walked out the door and we thought she left. I had my back to the door, when I heard her voice and turned around. By the time I turned around, she had blacked my eye, bloodied my nose, and had me on the floor with my arm twisted over my head. She finally got off of me and started yelling at me to leave because she has power of attorney. I walked in to pack and she told me I better run. I told her I am not running, but I am packing. I went to the clinic the next day to have my hand checked and nothing was broken. I packed, with the neighbor’s help, and left a message with my step-brother for him to pick up his mother. I moved to MO to care for my own mother. It wasn’t until a couple of days later that the swelling in my shoulder set in. I had to have tendons in my shoulder repaired where she ripped it up. The worst part was, at the time I was under a doctor’s care because I was in acute renal failure when she jumped me.

She said she was mad because she was tired of me telling her what to do, like when I told her to carry her boyfriend to the ER. Quite frankly, she tried to get me to hand her the medication again, and I think she was angry because she couldn’t set me up. I don’t think she beat me up on her on accord, even though she has been known to get that mad and have fights; and here is why I say this.  Back in 2013, before I went back out on the summer part of the Shattering The Silence Tour and Documentary Project, I was getting gas at a local gas station, Sonny’s. When I went in to pay for the gas, I hear this irate man, yelling behind me, “SHUT UP! SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!” I turned around to see who was talking to someone else, because I know they weren’t talking to me like that. But, yes this belligerent person was Sheriff’s Deputy Jerry Moore, who was doing all this yelling. I asked him who he thought he was yelling at like that; and he said, “You.” I said shut up, quit talking, and quit running your mouth.”  HHMM. I don’t know who the hell he thinks he is, but this ain’t gonna fly. He went on to tell me, “I better not tell people how we treated you.” There you have it! I just smiled and left. So no, I think the Springhill Police Department is behind my attack and all the other things they have done here. I tried to call back and press charges and got a Gwenn gave reason after reason, why I shouldn’t.

I want to tell you now; you cannot beat me up to shut me up! I am not my mother! She let men beat on her until she lost her mind, leaving her children to live a life of abuse and neglect. The names you call me, will not change the truth, or your indiscretions.  Today, I want the truth to be told. The citizens of Springhill deserve a better community.  Going along to get along, will never make a progressive future for your children. We can no longer afford to turn away in indifference.  While some may discount what I say is true, I have told you the truth. Just as I spoke the truth when I told you my ex raped our four-year-old daughter giving her gonorrhea, which only comes from a warm, wet, sexually atmosphere, not as a towel as Dr. Charles Hunsinger and his then attorney John Slattery proposed. According to Dr. Rose Bruette, at LSU Genealogical Pediatrics Control Disease Center, she said once it hits a towel and in the air, it dies, and cannot be transmitted this way; but this evidence was not allowed

This is not in the past, because it still affects now, for my granddaughters have shown signs of abuse.

When I raised my concerns and reported it, my children sided with their pedophile father, and continue to hand their daughters on a silver platter. They said I am no longer a part of the family! My heart breaks a million times over! Yes, I did report it to the local police, but nothing was done. I reported it to the CPS, which I had to prove that I was a mandated reporter. Maybe, they too, didn’t like to see they were wrong the first time. When they saw it was not my brother who committed the crime, they lost interest and told they did not have the time and resources to pursue the case. This is the same thing they told Daniel Alford, whose daughter died.

https://youtu.be/f8yhoBu78Dg

I am speaking up for my grandchildren to look back and see not everyone turned away in indifference; that not everyone who says, “I love you, wants to use you and abuse you!” I want them to know we are out here fighting for them! We want children to grow up in a safer world and break the multi-generational abuse of child sexual assault, which is the last great frontier to fight! I want them to know not to cower to abusers, bullies, intimidators, liars, manipulators, gaslighters. What is gaslighting? Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse the abuser uses to make the victim second guess themselves. The abuser or abusers, which can be family or coworkers, will use terms like, “You’re crazy – that never happened.” “It’s all in your head or you have a bad memory.” They will also move things around and hide things from you to make you feel like you are losing your mind.

Many times our families are destroyed from the enemy within. While families like to think this would never happen in our family, it happens more frequently than people imagine. It is up to us to protect our children, and not turn away in indifference because we like our standard of living. Our children are counting on us to protect them. The harm that rape, sodomy, and fondling, does to a child is damage that last a lifetime. Pedophiles, look like the average normal person next door. They serve in all walks of life, from a small house to the white house; all of which destroy our families, and leave a carnage, our children may never recover from. It may seem I can only pray for deliverance for my family, but I know I can do more.  I will fight like hell for them!

Please help us fight for all families by signing the petitions for No Statute of Limitations and Free DNA Testing and Processing for All Children of Sexual Assault. We need ambassadors and volunteers to help us present the bills before each state representatives before April to pass the bills on a unified front. Thank you for your assistance. You can reach me below.

Connie Lee/Founder/President/FACSAFounder.org

facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

318.540.4464

NO MORE OPPRESSION

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                                    NO MORE OPPRESSION

 

I want to challenge you to a new concept. A concept which will make many angry, confused, tearful, and courageous; for this concept will go against everything you have been taught and believe. What constitutes our beliefs; our family; the environment; our education; social news; media; or what the governmental controlled news allows us to hear?

Challenge your mind Connie Lee

I, like many others, are saddened by the current events, and the direction our country is headed. We have too many shootings, police violence, and violence in the streets, where all too often, police, criminals, loiters and vandalism goes on without any justice.

Dr. Martin Luther King said, “The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. Intelligence plus character – that is the goal of true education.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/m/martin_luther_king_jr.html#A0hkTpcL6YuCdwEV.99

We are afraid for the future of our families and children. What kind of legacy are we leaving them?

The gay rights movement won a huge victory for their rights to love and have their own family values. While many disagree with the Supreme Court rulings, others applauded their decision of moving the country forward. I have many friends who are straight and gay. I do not feel it is my right to judge and condemn, for I believe there is not one of us which deserves to stand before the throne of God. No matter what religion of faith you are, the color of your skin, or your beliefs, there will always be humans in our society, in our churches, synagogues, holy temples, who are adulterers, murderers, thieves, liars, gossipers, people who are coveting your neighbors possessions, drug users, glutens’, people who are caught up in being self-righteous and looking good, but not really serving God with a loyal and humble heart. There is not one of us without sin, nor are we here to judge and criticize, but to lead by example, to love, and to walk each other home.

I say, “No More Oppression!!” No more oppression of people who are different, who do not think or act like you! No more oppression of men, women, and innocent children!! One person’s rights, are no more valuable than the others. No person’s life is more valuable than the other. All Lives Matter!

We watch on television and social media, and shake our heads at the crimes of good people, who believe they are protesting and making a statement. You cross a line when you loot and burn down businesses of people, who worked their lives to build their dreams.

The killing of Michael Brown brought to light, what many have known for a long time; that blacks, immigrants, women, and the impoverished, are targeted by police officials more than any others. Many began the chant of “No Justice No Peace” as people took to the streets to protest, damaging homes, buildings, and city property.  What is right about that? Is it because of the killing of Michael Brown and others; or is it people were angry of all the injustices done to them, and found this a significant outlet to raise their voices in protest, for their own injustices in their lives? Wikipedia gives stats on racial crime at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race_and_crime_in_the_United_States

When people are impoverished, and feel they cannot succeed in life, they lash out at a system that is broken. A system where you can’t make enough money to pay for daycare and the bills to;  a system that constantly reaffirms you are not good enough, you are not worthy enough, you are not rich enough, to make it in this world. Yet, there are others who have learned to take the system for a ride and have multiple children to receive multiple checks; where doctors cheat the system, make fraudulent Medicare claims, at the expense of their patients,  receiving bigger paychecks for doctors; a system where children are punished with an inadequate school system, which crowds too many children in one classroom, and expects high scores to receive more funds for the school. When the children who are tired, under nourished, and cannot focus because of the drama at home, are put in a slow class or on Ritalin, or some other ADHD medicine, to help the classes out, we are selling the children down a river of chaos and addiction. After being on Ritalin for so long, what will they turn to at eighteen, when they graduate high school? Our schools claim to be drug free, yet continually push drugs on our children. Many parents do not realize that when they leave their children at school, the state has say over their children, rather than a parent, which is leaving parents fighting the court systems, to defend parental rights and beliefs.

It seems in this advanced technology age, we would have become more racially diverse, but that is not the case. We think we know about slavery because of our history books and media, but the truth is, there is a lot of history changed and altered in text books.

  • Slavery is the 100% ownership of a person and their labor, in a non-voluntary manner and environment.
  • Slavery was a worldwide phenomenon that has existed from prehistory to the 19th and 20th century, where it ended from a moral crusade and England’s William Wilberforce lifetime campaign; which was signed by Parliament to abolish slavery, in 1833, 3 days before he died.
  • Did you know that about only 6% of rich whites owned slaves? Most people were middle class and poor farmers themselves.
  • Slavery would have ended before the civil war because the middle class and poor thought it was appalling; and it drove down the price of free markets, making it hard to compete in selling their wares. States, who catered to the elite rich, made the poor and middle class hunt runaway slaves in the night.
  • ½ of American settlers to the America’s were white slaves.
  • In the 1600’s, most slaves were white Europeans. Over 30,000 Irish slaves were sold to the English settlers in the West Indies. By mid-1600’s, the Irish were the main slaves of Antigua and Montserrat, also being sold to other countries and the America’s. At that time 70% of the total population of Montserrat, were Irish slaves.
  • That Irish slaves were more predominate than black slaves. Blackslaves were considered worth more money than “Paddies/Irsh Slaves.”
  • Before Columbus came to the new world, American Indians practiced slavery. Ethiopia had slavery until 1942; Saudi Arabia until 1962; Peru until 1968; India until 1968; India until 1976; and Mauritania until 1980.
  • In Charleston, S.C., according to the U.S. Census Bureau, 407 black Americans, owned slaves themselves.
  • African’s sold their own people into slavery. It has been a way of life to resolve debt and poverty.
  • John Hope Franklin said, “28% of Negroes in New Orleans owned black slaves. They owned their kin and others. “Black Slave Owners – Free Black Slave Masters in S.C. 1790-1860.”
  • https://youtu.be/31E1gHowYcA “The Truth About Slavery”

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But many will not tell you this, because it does not fit their agenda, nor does it get them votes.

They say to be kind to everyone you meet, for they are fighting battles you know nothing about.” I believe this is true. We have expected our parents to be better people. The truth is, you cannot expect unhealthy parents to raise healthy children. There comes a time when we grow up and have to take responsibility and accountability for our own lives. We can’t expect a big government program to come in and fix everything. Real change will only come from communities helping communities, people helping people, and families helping families. We are all American’s who deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. Not one of us, is more deserving than another. We are all trying to make ends meet and to become successful for our families. Life is more than it seems and we are all complex people. There is no one size fits all; nor, are my rights more precious than yours.

If we really wanted to solve race issues, we would address each other with respect and dignity; and call each other by birth names, not names given. In this process, we have to examine our own motivations and beliefs, and the way we interact with others; for in doing so, we grow to become better people; like God refines us through fire, trials, and tribulations. We all want hope, healing, and peace! There is always room for Reconciliation and Redemption.

We all want the American dream, regardless of your race, religion, ethnicity, gender, or age. No one’s rights are more important than another person’s rights. In America we have the Constitution and State laws to abide by. If something offends you, don’t watch it, eat it, or remove it, do what the rest of us does, who honors your beliefs, and turn the other way. Removing a flag will not remove hatred. America is a big place, and there is room for all of us.

Nine black parishioners lost their lives in the house of God recently, at the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church.

They were there, as many other times, loving and praising God. When the young man came in of a different race and belief, they embraced him with love, compassion, and witnessed the love of God to him. Tragically, they lost their lives that day. They led by example, to lead others home. Their legacy will eternally be a legacy of love. This is something that young man seemed to not have from home, for he looked to others for guidance, to belong, to fit in, to validate him as a person, and for love and acceptance.

The dead, six women and three men, were all African American. Eight died at the scene; the ninth, Daniel Simmons, died at MUSC Medical Center.[37] They were all killed by multiple gunshots fired at close range.[31][38] One unidentified person was wounded but survived. Five individuals survived the shooting unharmed, including Felicia Sanders, mother of slain victim Tywanza Sanders, and her 5-year old granddaughter, along with Polly Sheppard, a Bible study member. Pinckney’s wife and daughter were also inside the building during the shooting.[4][39] Those killed were identified as:[40][41]

  • Cynthia Marie Graham Hurd (54) – Bible study member and manager for the Charleston County Public Library system; sister of Malcolm Graham
  • Susie Jackson (87) – a Bible study and church choir member
  • Ethel Lee Lance (70) – the church sexton
  • Depayne Middleton-Doctor (49) – a pastor who was also employed as a school administrator and admissions coordinator at Southern Wesleyan University
  • Clementa C. Pinckney (41) – the church pastor and a South Carolina state senator
  • Tywanza Sanders (26) – a Bible study member; nephew of Susie Jackson
  • Daniel Simmons (74) – a pastor who also served at Greater Zion AME Church in Awendaw
  • Sharonda Coleman-Singleton (45) – a pastor; also a speech therapist and track coach at Goose Creek High School
  • Myra Thompson (59) – a Bible study teacher

It is the hate and anger instilled in our children. Guns like cars and spoons are used for good or bad. More children are killed by abortion (54,559,615), than guns (524,278)http://siftingreality.com/2013/01/21/deaths-from-abortion-vs-guns-since-1973/ . When a society does not care for its women, children, homeless, elderly, how do expect to have a prosperous nation. Children are abused, raped, and murdered, yet the outcries are ignored, while good people turn away in indifference. How do you expect unhealthy parents raise healthy children? We blame them for the hell they put us through, but it comes a time where we have to be responsible and accountable for our actions. This young man wanted to belong, to be accepted, and to be noticed. He horrifically murdered great humans who had everything he did not – love.

We can no longer turn our backs on our children. You see their anger in the violence in society; in our schools; in our homes; in our churches; and in our work places. No longer, can good people turn away in indifference any more. It costs states billions of dollars to combat the effects of neglect, abuse, rape, and murder of our children; so you cannot say, “It does not affect you.”

( Approximately, 124 Billion Dollars, according to the CDC)http://www.cdc.gov/media/releases/2012/p0201_child_abuse.html

Slavery still exist today. It happens all over the world, especially in your own community. Our teens and children are targeted by the porn and human trafficking business, where many people go missing and can be snatched off the street to be used for the sex trade, brothels, domestic servitude, warehouses and manufacturing work, kiln trade, cocoa trade, coffee trade, fishing trade, and organ trade. Human trafficking is a 32 billion dollar profit industry! As long as their is a demand for forced labor, human trafficking will continue unless you get involved and speak up. Human trafficking hotline is 1-888-3737-888.

I say, “No more expecting men to man up. No more expecting women to sit aside in silence, in the presence of men. No more expecting trauma survivors to be ignored and not receive the help they need from a broken society and it’s mental health system. No more for children to keep secrets imposed on them by fear, degradation, and shame, by abusive and sexual predators.” I say,“Enough Is Enough!” “No More Silence!” “No More Oppression!”

no more oppression pic

Connie J. Lee

conniesmiles51@gmail.com

April 25, 2015 Is A Pedophile and Sexual Predator Holiday

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pedophile stats

Alice Day is a Pedophile and Sexual Predator holiday.
Although they pose a constant threat to children 365 days a year, they have designated this day, usually April 25, to celebrate the molestation and rape of little girls. Pedophiles/Predators/Child rapists go out in full force to events held for children, parks, child-centered establishments, acquiring photographs, information, and personal contact with children.
here are a few posts of the subject….stay alert for your children.
http://ffkfightingforkids.weebly.com/logos-used-by-peadophiles.
The FACSA Foundation and Daimon Glenn are partnering  to  counteract  this day with  sharing the  stories of survivors, art, music, dance, film, poetry,  writing, photography, and  other forms of art to express the pain we have endured so long; to give power to the voices who have been silent for so long. Please join us for this special ground breaking event at  https://www.facebook.com/groups/1537300353197139/
It is by  the expression of art of the survivor that will release the  shame, degradation, fear, and pain, survivor’s have held so long. They can finally sing from their hearts, “We are free! Thank God we are free at last” For in sharing their stories, they  have shattered the silence  and secrecy, and the power the perpetrator has  had over them, tumbles like a house of cards. This will be painful for many because family and friends may not want  shame brought to the family,, loss of income, or having to deal with the problem of child sexual assault, which they have denied for so long.

This is no longer our generation! Today, we stand and shout, “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH” and “WE WILL BE SILENT NO MORE” Today, I pass this baton on to you, for the children are counting on you!

We are not just asking for people to share their stories and art. We are giving people the chance to be heard and to heal. By sharing their stories, they are inspiring others to share theirs and heal, as well. In doing so, we have to educate the educators. We have to provide more sentencing and enforce the laws we have. We need to restructure the judicial and mental health systems and design better programs to meet the current needs of survivors of trauma. We all have trauma in our lives, whether we are survivor’s of sexual assault, veterans, law enforcement, or living every day life. We will have to provide funding for judicial and mental health programs to provide a better society and safer environments to children. Your voice is more powerful than you can imagine. Together, we can move mountains.

Connie Lee/Founder/President/FACSAFoundation.org

facsasavethechildren@Hotmail.com

February Is National Teen Dating Violence Prevention Month

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love 3

February Is National Teen Dating Violence Prevention Month

How many of you are familiar with the Chris Brown assault upon his girlfriend Rhianna? Chris Brown and Rhianna are two pop stars, who made national headlines when Chris beat Rhianna after they fought over a text message from another girl. Regardless of how angry he got her, he had no right to hit her; and he should have walked away when he got that angry. How do you think he should have responded to this situation?  Since this was not the first time he had beaten her, why do you think she stayed? What do you think she could have done to prevent the abuse from her partner? According to some teens they feel this is common in relationships, and unfortunately, this has become there comfort zone. Statistics show that one in three teenagers has experienced violence in a dating relationship. In dating violence, one partner tries to maintain power and control over the other through abuse.

Love isn't pain

If you will look around your classroom, church, auditorium, or any public setting and think of these statistics, as you take a mental snapshot of your classmates. One in three girls are sexually assaulted before the age 18 and one of six boys; and that is only the ones who have reported it. 90% of sexually assaulted children never report it. They don’t report being raped by an abuser, a family member, their partner, or a stranger because of shame, feeling dirty, wondering what they did to deserve it, they don’t want to break up the family, feel like no one will believe them, or does not want to get the abuser in trouble. This also allows the perpetrator to hurt someone else because they don’t stop, seldom change w/o counseling, and you can’t fix them.

Regardless of age, Teen and adult abusive partners will demonstrate some of the following classic abusive behaviors:

At first they shower you with a lot of affection, gifts, and love. Then they become very

  • Controlling what you say; who you talk to; where you go; and how you dress
  • excessively texts you
  • belittling you in front of friends and family
  • Hitting you; leaving bruises and cuts
  • verbally abusing you
  • isolating you from friends and family
  • emotional outburst
  • uses force in arguments
  • always blames others for their mistakes and faults
  • sexually assaults you
  • ·believe their partners are their possession; then they become obsessed with them, which can lead to stalking:

 love of a good man

  • ·Stalking is the willful and repeated following, watching, and / or harassing of another person. Most of the time, the purpose of stalking is to attempt to force a relationship with someone who is unwilling or otherwise unavailable. Unlike other crimes, which usually involve one act, stalking is a series of actions that occur over a period of time. Although stalking is illegal, the actions that contribute to stalking are legal, such as gathering information, calling someone on the phone, sending gifts, emailing or instant messaging. Such actions by themselves are not usually abusive, but can become abusive when frequently repeated over time. http://law.findlaw.com/state-laws/stalking/louisiana/
Willful, malicious, and repeated following or harassing with   intent to place in fear of death or bodily injury.
Punishment/Classification Maximum 1 year jail and $1000 fine. If had dangerous weapon:   fine $1,000 and/or jail 1 year. If stalking and protective order for same   victim, or criminal proceeding for stalking victim or injunction: jail 90   days minimum and 2 years maximum and/or fined maximum $5,000. If victim under   18, maximum 1 year and/or $2000 fine. Note: anyone over 13 who stalks a child   12 and under and is found to have placed child in reasonable fear of death or   bodily injury of family member shall be punished by 1 year minimum, 3 years   maximum in jail and/or $1,500 minimum, $5,000 maximum fine
Penalty for Repeat Offense If 2nd within 7 years: jail minimum 180 days and maximum 3   years and/or fined maximum $5,000. If 3rd or subsequent within 7 years: jail   minimum 2 years and maximum 5 years and/or fined maximum $5,000

 love yourself 3

Abusers will try to isolate you from your family, do not let them. If you find yourself or someone you know in an abusive relationship talk to a teacher, family member, pastor, counselor, or call the FACSA Foundation. The important thing is to tell.

 love yourself 5

So how do young men and young women get involved partner, when they should know better and leave? Out of 6 billion people in the world, why do we fall in love with the partners we choose? You can walk into a room of people and may find many attractive, but there will be one who captivates your interest more than the others because of pheromones. Your nose emits odorless chemicals called pheromones that peeks your interest around a certain individual. Guys like to impress girls with their status, wit, charm, physical appearance, humor, and talents. While ladies like to impress the guys by twirling their fingers in their hair, batting their eyes, acting sweet and charming, or pretending to be interested in something they could care less about. Now guys, this does not mean you can put your sweaty armpits in the girl’s faces to make them fall madly in love with; this will probably get you hit a few times.

Another factor, besides being a hormonal teenager, is the fact that, as we grow up, we watch our parents every day. We see them laugh together, love each other, or we see them argue with one another, cheat on one another, lie to each other, or be abusive to each other; and this imprint becomes our comfort zone and the model of our future relationships. We say I will never be like my mother or I will never be like my dad, but subconsciously we choose our first loves that have tendencies like our parents because this is our comfort zone. It isn’t until we get older, with more experience, for us to realize what kind of relationship is a healthy relationship and find a person who loves us, as we are, with flaws and all. Because when it comes down to it, you will never change them, you cannot fix them, they will not get better, and abuse only escalates. You cannot love enough for two; nor can you make it work by yourself.  You deserve to be loved and accepted as you are; and you have to pass on others until you find a partner who can do that. Not everyone will fit into the mold you fantasize as your soul mate; and trying to make them into what you want will only lead to a lot of heart of ache. If you are dating an abusive partner, regardless of how much you love them, you have to ask yourself, is this someone I would want to have children with. Would I want my children to be yelled at and belittled for every little thing they do wrong? Your children deserve better than that; you deserve better than that.  If you have someone in your life that is physically and verbally abusive to you, you need to tell your family, a teacher, a counselor, the FACSA Foundation, or an adult who will listen; and keep telling until someone listens. Abused friends and family will demonstrate the following behaviors:

  • Their partner controls what they say; who they talk to; where they go; and how they dress
  • They may/will be manipulated with money by their abuser
  • Their partner will make them fearful by actions or looks
  • Hitting them; leaving bruises and cuts
  • verbally abusing them
  • be isolated from friends and family
  • will take up for abuser; and may mention their abuse but laugh it off as a joke
  • they will try to please the abuser in anyway, but nothing will ever please them
  • believe they are their partners possession
  • Is always blamed for their partners mistakes and faults
  • Has been sexually assaults by their partner
  • Know the facts about relationship abuse.
  • Give assurance that you believe your friend’s story.
  • Listen and let her share her feelings.
  • Do not judge or give advice. Talk about available options and resources.
  • Physical safety is the first priority. If you believe a friend is in danger, voice that concern. Help create a safety plan.
  • Respect your friend’s right to confidentiality.
  • Say that you care and want to help.
  • Don’t be upset if your friend doesn’t react the way you think she should. Let her talk about the caring aspects of the      relationship as well. People who are being controlled by their partner’s      behavior must consider many factors before coming to a conclusion about how to access safety. Let her make her own decisions and support her throughout the process.
  • Give clear messages, including:
    • Your actions do not cause the abuse.
    • You are not to blame for your partner’s behavior.
    • You cannot change her partner’s behavior.
    • Apologies and promises are a form of manipulation.
    • You are not alone.
    • Abuse is not loss of control; it is a means of control.
  • It is helpful to provide support to survivors. However, there are some forms of advice that are not useful and even dangerous for them to hear:
    • Don’t tell them what to do, when to leave or when not to leave.
    • Don’t tell them to go back to the situation and try a little harder.
    • Don’t rescue them by trying to find quick solutions.
    • Don’t suggest you try to talk to the abusive partner to straighten things out.
    • Don’t place yourself in danger by confronting the abuser.
    • Don’t tell them they should stay for the sake of the children.
  • Never recommend couples counseling in situations of emotional or physical abuse. It is dangerous for the victim and will not lead to a resolution.
  • Encourage separate counseling for the individuals, if they want counseling.

Adapted from EWA, Canada

value yourself

How to Help a Friend Who is a Sexual Assault Survivor

When talking to a survivor of sexual assault, here are some key ideas to keep in mind:

  • Validation: Accept what you hear. Many survivors fear they will not be believed. They are afraid that their experience will be minimized as “not important” or made into a catastrophe. Let the survivor state her or his views,  feelings, beliefs, and opinions. Do not be judgmental.
  • Empowerment: Allow survivors to direct their own course of action, no matter how much      you think your idea would help them. An assault takes away the victim’s power and control over their self and situation; regaining that sense of control helps the survivor in the recovery process.
  • Information: Present survivors with resources and available options. Initially, the victim may be so overwhelmed that it is impossible for them to hear everything. Be patient and willing to repeat yourself. Respect the person’s decision as to what to do.
  • Privacy: Assure survivors that you will keep the matter private. Explain that you may need to consult with resources to understand how to help her. If total anonymity is necessary, you and/or the survivor may get information and support without revealing your names.
  • Listen: Let survivors disclose as much about the assault as they are comfortable with. Do not press for details, as this can feel intrusive and controlling.

In responding to the survivor use the same words she or he does in describing the event. If the survivor uses the word “rape,” then use it in reflective listening. If the survivor uses the expression “something bad happened,” stay with that. Be empathetic, non-judgmental, and help the survivor feel safe. Avoid labeling the experience for them. Remember, survivors may feel guilty and responsible. You can reassure them that no one deserves to be assaulted and it was not their fault. Be particularly sensitive if a survivor has special needs based on ethnicity, gender, religion, sexual orientation, and/or disability.

 Valenitnes 4

Even though it should never occur, the fact is dating violence and abuse happens every day, regardless of education or the lack thereof, rich or poor, race, or religion. People do not leave because they are afraid to; they are mentally and physically beaten down; or feel they have nowhere to turn.

  • If you have been abused by your partner, or you know someone who has you can call for resources:
  • the National Dating Abuse Hotline 1 (866) 331-9474
  • loveisrespect.org is a new 24 hour resource that utilizes telephone and web-based interactive technology to reach teens and young adults experiencing dating abuse. The Helpline numbers are: (866) 331-9474 and TTY (866) 331-8453. The peer to peer online individual chat function is available from 4 p.m. to midnight and can be accessed from the website.
  • Local Police
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline 1(800) 799-7233

If you plan on leaving, make a safe exit:

  • Know the phone number of a safe house or a local women’s battered shelter
  • Tell someone you trust and develop a plan; use code words if you are in trouble. A visual sign could be if the light is on it is safe; if the light is off you are in trouble
  • Go to a doctor if you are injured and report the incident
  • Do not go back to the abuser; your life could be at risk and no love is worth that.
  • File a report and let the charges stick; regardless of the partner’s threats
  • Reassure children of a safe place and their job is not to protect you.
  • Keep the car fueled, money hidden, cell charged, and evacuation plan ready
  • Pack a bag and hide it if necessary, with important documents, like social security numbers, birth certificates, medical information, marriage license, extra car keys, car title, banking information, important phone numbers, shoes, clothes, and toiletry items; maybe the kids favorite toy, to calm them.
  • Know abusers schedule and a safe time to leave
  • Erase you internet search history and be careful who you reach out to
  • If you call for help, immediately dial another number right after that, so the abuser will not know who you called last.

If you leave:

  • Change your routine
  • keep your doors locked

Keep a certified copy of your restraining order with you at all times. (6 months max; can get a $500 fine or imprisonment)

  • Install security systems in your new place
  • Get a P O Box
  • Get caller id
  • Avoid going to where the abuser is, when possible. If necessary, carry protectors with you like law enforcement.

love of your life

You don’t deserve to be treated this way;  you do deserve to be valued as a person, listened to without being yelled at, criticized, or judged; and you deserve to be loved. Despite what you think that person is bringing to your life, they are actually taking more than they offer. You can’t afford to trade yourself, your self -esteem, or possibly, your life for what you have them?  You have to learn to value yourself as a person, respect yourself despite your mistakes; and know today is a new day to start fresh. Learn to protect yourself and make better choices for your life; because every choice you make, regardless of how small, will affect the rest of your life. Every action becomes a behavior; and a behavior becomes who you are. There will be times in your life where you will have to take a good hard look at your life; and change what you don’t like about it.

I will close with a quote from Jim Rohn, “If you don’t make a plan for your life, chances are, you will fall into someone else’s; and guess what they have planned for you; not much!”

Connie Lee/FACSA Foundation/Founder/President

FACSAFOUNDATION.ORG

facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com

http://facsafoundationvirtualexpo.ning.com/

valentine love and affection

The  Dating Bill of Rights according to the ACADV http://www.acadv.org/dating.html

The Dating Bill of Rights

I Have The Right To:

  •     Ask for a date
  •     Refuse a date
  •     Suggest Activities
  •     Refuse any activities,

            Even if my date is

            Excited about them

  •     Have my own feelings

           And be able to express

           Them

  •     Say, “I think my friend

            Is wrong and their 

            Actions are inappropriate.

  •     Tell Someone Not To

            Interrupt Me

  •     Have my limits and

            Values respected

  •     Tell my partner when

            I need affection

  •     Refuse affection
  •     Be heard
  •     Refuse to lend money
  •     Refuse sex anytime,

            For any reason

  •     Have friends and

            Space aside from

            My partner

____________________________________________________________________

I     Have The Responsibility Too

  •     Determine my limits and

            Values

  •     Respect the limits of others
  •     Communicate clearly and 

            Honestly

  •     Not violate limits of others
  •     Ask for help when I need it
  •     Be considerate
  •     Check my actions and decisions

            To determine whether they are

            Good or bad for me

  •     Set High Goals For Myself

 

your heart my heart

New Years Resolutions vs Life Changing Goals

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                   new years resolution        

                                   HAPPY NEW YEAR!     

 

When is the last time you can say you were truly happy and laughter was an everyday occurrence for your life? When was the last time you tried something new, for the first time, which excited every cell of your being, and your eyes lit up like a Christmas tree? For many, is has been too long! While making more money will make most people happy, it really isn’t money that buys happiness. People who acquire wealth find it just makes them more selfish and a bigger scrooge, or it makes your generous nature shine, from the more people you will be able to bless.

 

What people long for is the respect, admiration, acceptance, and love they believe they will receive from money. When you buy the bigger house, fancier car, or the latest gadgets, you are making a statement about yourself, your life, and your spending habits.  What we most desire is to learn to truly live, rather merely exist. We want to know our lives mattered and we have made a difference in the lives of others. We want our legacy to be one of value in this world!

 

When I began the Shattering The Silence Tour and Documentary Project, I left home with a meager savings and stepped out in faith, that I was following a vision. Every time funds were low, God always provided a donation. God never said we would be successful, but commands us to step out in faith. You want everyone to love your work and appreciate all the blood sweat, and tears, associated with the journey, but let’s face it, you live in a cruel world. You just have to give it your best and let people perceive it as they well. Never listen to the opinions of naysayers; especially those who have never fulfilled their own dreams. They are usually comfortable having you in the same state of mind they are in, miserable and broke.

 

 

Survivors have been told most of their life, in one form or another that their lives do not matter. They have been told in one form or another, that they are a reject, unwanted, unloved, only to be used, abused, neglected, sold, raped, and murdered. For those of you who did not commit suicide and are still struggling every day, I want to thank you for hanging in there. I commend you for forging ahead and making a difference in the world around you, so others will not have to endure the pain you have been through. You are wanted, you are loved, you matter, and your voice has more power than you can imagine! If you have been trying to succeed and make your audacious goal happen, I recommend making a mind map on a piece of paper; or on your computer. Simply, place your picture in the middle; draw a line and at the end, write your goals you would like to achieve; it is best to do this as a spider web, because people are complex and they like to achieve different goals at the same time. Now, write A,B,C, and so on, as steps to reach this goal; then break down each step it takes to achieve this step into what you need to do, who do you need to contact, what do you need to learn, and the money you need to raise. Do not focus on all the steps it takes to get there, but focus only on A, until it is completed, before you move on to B. Before you know it, you are further along than when you started, and you have to finish, because you have come too far to quit now.  I would suggest working each day, on two small goals, while working on your big audacious goal. Just make sure you spend time each day on each goal, and  that you complete your goal. We build our confidence when we accomplish goals and we feel like we have failed when we do not commit to the challenge of finishing the goal. Make sure the goal is realistic and attainable.

The New Year brings promise and hope for a better tomorrow. It is a chance to get it right or to achieve the impossible dream, even though we know previous resolutions are trampled in the mud and snow within a few short months. I challenge you to go for the big audacious goal this year. You have waited a long time, promising yourself you will achieve your dream when the timing is right, when there is enough money, or “Someday”.  Today is the day my friend! If not now, then when?

If you need to make money for the dream you have for you and your family, David Drews from, Renegade University, has over 80 money making tips for you.  http://www.mastermind-university.com/quick-cash-ideas_ways-to-make-money.php

Tony Robbins published a book called “Money Mastery” which is an excellent resource on building a nest egg from nothing, despite your age and saving money on fees for investing. 

http://books.simonandschuster.com/MONEY-Master-the-Game/Tony-Robbins/9781476757803 

http://www.amazon.com/MONEY-Master-Game-Financial-Freedom/dp/1476757801

 

 

I look forward to hearing about your accomplishments. You can write me at facsasavethechildren@hotmail.com and share your progress. With enough submissions, we can include them in the magazine. Survivors of sexual assault and human trafficking have overcome many obstacles to achieve what they have in life. We would love to share your success, to inspire others. I wish you many blessings for 2015! Happy New Year from the FACSAFoundation.org

LIVE YOUR LIFE OVER – MOTIVATIONAL VIDEO (FEATURING LES BROWN)

THE LAND OF UNFULFILLED DREAMS  and EXCUSES.  Don’t let your dreams die with you! Photo By Connie Lee

snow in Maine 943

Gr8 Motivational Clip – Even Eagles needs a Push.

    born to be happy